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Q. What goes ninety nine plonk? A. A centipede with a wooden leg.
Q. What goes up the chimney down but can't go down the chimney up? A. An umbrella.
Q. What cot can't you sleep in? A. An apricot.
Q. What can you put in a box to make it lighter? A. Holes
"How old are you sonny?" asked the man. "Six Sir." Came the brisk reply.
"Six!" echoed the man, " And you are not even as high as my umbrella!"
The boy drew himself up to his full height -
" And how old is your umbrella Sir?" he demanded.

A singlet is a young swan.

Ceyeals are films shown at the pictures.

The Royal Mint is what the King puts on his roast lamb.

Jack: What's the difference between an elephant and a pound of sausages?

Bill: I don't know.

Jack: Well you'd be a fine one to send for a pound of sausages.

Teacher: " Why are you so late Tommy?"

Tommy: " I overslept Sir"

Teacher: " Where would I be if I overslept?"

Tommy: " In bed Sir"

Teacher: " I asked you to write an essay on what you would do

if you were a millionare. You've written nothing"

Dave: " Well, that's what I'd do Miss!"

Q. Can you jump higher then a metre wall?

A. Yes. A wall can't jump.
  • A proper crop of poppies is a proper poppy crop
  • Crunch crispy crisps quickly
  • A copper cup of coffee is a copper coffee cup.
  • Better batter. Bitter butter.

After preparing fish, wash hands in cold tea.

This gets rid of the fishy smell on the skin.


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Foxton Maternity Home 1942-1982 Page 59


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